Meaningless Sex Is No Longer Meaningful

Sex that becomes meaningless, when it started off with the sole purpose of being meaningless

Most guys think about sex a lot; it’s quite natural. Me? I write about it a lot. Whether it’s female prostitutes or male bisexual prostitutes, or even highly erotic short stories, I’m writing down things I seem to think I might know a little bit about. This post is no different. I’ve gone down the rabbit hole of exploring what happens when Meaningless Sex Is No Longer Meaningful. “Sex on the brain,” anyone?

After another meaningful conversation with a friend over far too many drinks somewhere in Florence, my friend and I talked about random sex encounters or one night stands or as they’re more fondly referred to. What else do guys talk about when drunk? My friend made the comment that up until recently, random sex encounters that were meaningless, were perfect for him. The getting to know them part, irrelevant and in fact, a pointless step that is thankfully eliminated thanks to so many online dating apps. Apps that are in fact designed to promote meaningless sex are perfect for my friend. It’s a bit like McDonalds, it fills you up for an hour or so, but then you’re famished again. That’s what happens when you have meaningless sex isn’t it? You find yourself wanting more a short time later. It’s not unheard of for people to have multiple sexual encounters in one day – whether they choose to admit it or not, it does actually happen. It’s totally ok if a guy does it. But if a girl does it? OMG she’s a whore. tsk tsk – oh judgemental one.

But you wouldn’t have a meaningful encounter with someone, then go looking for a repeat of that experience somewhere else a short time later. A meaningful experience usually involves some kind of communication; perhaps a little bit of knowledge about that other person – maybe a mental connection – perhaps even some shared commonality, but what it boils down to is that when you get under those sheets (or against the fridge, washing machine, on the lawnmower in the garage, outdoor swings etc.) the sex is a little more meaningful. There might be lots of kissing involved, turning the experience towards a more passionate note. There might be more body contact or some locking of the eyes. I’m not talking about that creepy moment when you’re passionately kissing someone and open your eyes to see theirs wide and glaring at you. That’s a boner killer right there. Tune in the psycho movie soundtrack.

My friend’s issue is that up until recently, he’s been highly satisified with short, sharp and pointful – but by all definition, meaningless – sex with complete strangers. Often, he doesn’t even know their name. When I questioned my friend about some of his most memorable meaningless sexual encounters, he refers to them as The Brazilian, The Singaporean, The Black Guy, The Latino or The 20-something who looked more like 40. There are no names. My friend has been around the world visiting all these countries, from the comfort of his own bed, and he can’t tell me a single capital city name. The problem now is, my friend finds that Meaningless Sex Is No Longer Meaningful because he had a very meaningful encounter a couple of weeks ago.

When my friend’s meaningless-turned-meaningful encounter arrived after a brief online chat – and by chat, I mean, swapping some rather pointful pictures – there was supposed to be no talking, no slow undressing of the eyes before they got down to business. The mistake my friend made was asking for a name, then offering a drink. One thing led to another and before they knew it, the supposedly meaningless experience was ruined. They spent a few hours talking, drinking, debating, caressing each other with their eyes, flirting and the occasional lightly-brushing of the skin. Then they began to kiss; passionately. Hot tongues explored, ears were licked, necks were tickled, eyes were gazed into and noses were rubbed. Undressing was a blur and body on body action followed as plenty of foreplay proceeded, then slowly but surely, the fucking began. It wasn’t intense and fast, it was slow and rhythmic. In fact, I’d argue it wasn’t fucking. It was making love. That is what I mean when I say that Meaningless Sex Is No Longer Meaningful. That encounter meant something. My friend and his lover, made love for 2 days. In fact, the lover was supposed to be in Florence en-route to Milan, then London but ended up spending 2 days in Florence and couldn’t even tell you where the statue of David is.

So as we had our drinks, and my friend filled me in – no pun intended – he was a little distraught as he told me that all of his meaningless encounters since that day a few weeks ago, have become meaningless. Halfway through a very hot – repeat meaningless encounter – with The Brazilian, my friend lost his boner. “Do I have Erectile Dysfunction?” he asks me in all honesty. “No,” I told him, “You have meaningless sex dysfunction.”

When Meaningless Sex Is No Longer Meaningful it’s time to start looking at meaningful encounters. Yes, I’m talking about that dirty, disgusting, horrible, I-Can’t-Believe-I’m-Even-Suggesting-This word. Dating. Gulp.

Can you go from a life of promiscuous meaningless sex to a much more accepted form of dating? I think so. That’s possibly the natural progression for many.

Once McDonald’s stops filling you up, you’re going to start looking for 5 star meals.

Fox